JOY TO THE WORLD!!!

I'm back!!! Mal's play is finished. She did fantastic. I have to say, in spite of being her mom, she is a great character actress! And even though I still have a week of craziness ahead of me to prepare for our women's retreat, I plan resume blogging.

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I always enjoyed Thanksgiving. Unfortunately, in the last 10 years or so, it seems that society sees Thanksgiving as a necessary interruption in the Christmas shopping season, a day to rest up and plan before Black Friday. If you know me at all, you know that I am an admitted Christmas-aholic. Even if I begin shopping before Thanksgiving, (which I haven't had time to do the last couple of years,) even if there's a nice weather day and we hang the lights on the house before Thanksgiving, Christmas does not begin for me until after Santa has ridden into Herald Square, NYC, in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade and the turkey leftovers are in the fridge! The lights don't get plugged in, the Christmas music doesn't get turned on, and the Santas don't come out of the boxes until the day after Thanksgiving. (I was going to write that the Santa's don't come out of the closet, but that would start another whole Santa controversy! And if you don't know about the 150 Santas in my closet, you will soon!)

So...you may have guessed it already, for at least the next 28 days this blog will be about what I find joyful about the Christmas season!

A little background...I am 3rd generation Christmas-aholic. My Nanny (my dad's mother) prepared for Christmas from Dec. 26th on...I am not kidding. My Nanny was the original crafter. As the parents of FIVE sons (take that Andrea Olley!) they had a house with 3 finished floors (including the basement) and an almost finished attic. As the sons moved out, the craft supplies moved in. When she passed away, it tooks weeks to clean out the house. I learned what a "gross" was from my Nanny...12 dozen of something...ususally artificial flowers (plastic...it was before "silk" flowers!) We were making homemade Christmas tree decorations in the 1960's...elaborate beaded balls...I had sore fingers for weeks from pushing straight pins into foam balls. She made centerpieces, wreaths, ceramic trees and figurines and candy dishes, crocheted Christmas doilies,...you name it! She and my Pop-Pop knew every wholesaler from New York City to Englishtown, NJ.

My Dad also loves Christmas. He says it's for kids. Really all he means by that is that kids get the biggest share of the presents. He loves Christmas, the music, the lights, the shopping, the food, having family around. He too decorates no matter what. My father and step mother travel between Thanksgiving and Christmas every year since they were married 27 years ago. He's had major surgeries right before or after Christmas. But no matter what the decorations go up, and they go down. He loves to shop for toys, and even though he has a hard time walking long distances, he will track down what he wants. He's even said more than once he would give us all the money to shop for our kids for him, but he never does. My Dad has a cathedral ceiling in his living room, so there's almost always a big Christmas tree. He's gone out an bought at least one, if not two, table top trees, only to go back to the 9 or 10 footer!

And then there's me...I can't tell you why my Nanny loved then, or my Dad loves now, Christmas the way they do. I never thought to ask. But in the next few weeks, I'm going to tell you why I love this time of year, why it brings me so much joy, and what some of my best memories are. You may have no interest in any of this...so if you don't want to read, I'm not insulted. I'm going to get joy just from writing!

Blessings in the wee hours of the morning.

It's 1 AM Friday night/Saturday morning, take your pick. Yes it's been a busy week, so why am I blogging at this time of night?!? I'm still up because we are hosting the Friday night cast party for Mal's play. The cast is small, 14 in all, plus there are a few other kids here who are in the drama club. Most have gone home, thanks to the NJ "Cinderella" license, and of course most of the rest are being picked up by parents who want to go to bed! They are a great group of kids, about 25 or so squeezed into my living room with chips, pizza, cookies, candy and soda. They were polite, grateful for the hospitality, and they cleaned up after themselves. What more could I ask for! It was great to hear the laughter, talk to them about their performances, and to have a full house! I spend a lot of time around these kids during the course of the productions because of my involvement in the Theater Guild. And I just felt blessed tonight by being a part of Mallory's big week.

This is Mallory's first major lead in a play, and we hoped that many of our family members would come to see her. Everyone lives well over an hour or more away, or out of state, and unfortunately, for many reasons, no one has made it yet. Hopefully a few will make it tomorrow.

But I am joyful and blessed because since her very first play 4 or 5 years ago, we have always had great support from our church family. I would say on average, about 20 or more of our family in Christ come out and see her perform, no matter how small or big her part is. Some travel over a half an hour to get here. Some may really want to be relaxing at home, but instead they come out to love on my daughter. I can't tell you how much that means to us.

So now that the last of the young men have left my house, I can go to bed while the girls that are still here have their slumber party. But first, for those of you reading this that have ever come to any or all of Mallory's plays...THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART! Mallory will always know that she was loved, and that because of Christ, you are her family!

BUSY, BUSY, BUSY!!!

I haven't posted in several days, and I know you all just wait with bated breath until you get to read my next profound statement! (Oh...visions of my own grandeur!) I'm not sure how often I'm going to get to this in the next few weeks, and my brain is bursting with ideas to write about...hopefully my 35 year old mind will remember all my thoughts. (Okay, let's just pretend I'm having a senior moment and forgot how old I really am!) Okay, I'm delerious, I admit it, but I'm SO busy!!! Steve Sikes spoke about fervent prayer last weekend, well I'm in fervent work mode.

Next week is Mal's play...and even though I tried not to, I got sucked into the "Theater Guild" which is the parent organization that supports the drama productions at the high school...basically a "booster club." I started out by volunteering to run the flower concessions at the plays...I figured twice a year, and I'm done. I specifically told them I did not want anymore responsibility than that...I'm now the treasurer...(okay, I admit it, Dave created all the spread sheet programs for me...but my name's on the account!) AND I'm also now the V.P....don't ask. So I am "fervently" working on all of that.

AND...as all you Pitman folk know...I'm working on the Women's Retreat...(SHAMELESS PLUG... Please get your scripture references in by Nov. 23rd!) I have a title for that event too...I'm the "Retreat General"...which means I get to boss the "Queen" around...but don't tell her that, she's under the delusion that she's actually in charge!

I really do love being busy...maybe someday I'll actually get a job and get paid for doing stuff like this when I'm laid off from my present position in a couple of years.

So anyway...all I intended on writing was..."I'm busy...here's a joke to make you smile...and remember to CHOOSE JOY TODAY!

MISSING HUSBAND

Rick was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 10 seconds, AND IT BETTER BE THERE".

The next morning Rick got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Rick has been missing since Friday. Please pray for him.

The Treasures of Patti's Heart

This morning in our women's Bible class, "Treasured In My Heart," Patti led our lesson. Patti usually blogs about the class to share the message to a wider audience. But since she isn't going to blog on herself today, some of us who attended will be blogging in her place. So here's my take on the class. I'm not going to document the class in the detail that Patti usually does, I'll just highlight what was meaningful to me.

Patti's opening point was to "Honor the Differences" in our children. Some of our children may have special needs that differentiate them from their siblings and other children, or it could be different talents and gifts, even different trials. But above all, Patti wants us all to honor those differences and value each child for who they are....as in my last post, I am reminded of Jerry and Lynn Jones' oft quoted line, "Not right, not wrong, just different." This is the point she wanted us to walk away with this morning.

But for me, there were two specific things she spoke about that struck me and resonated with me.

First, we read the scripture passages in Luke that spoke of Mary treasuring in her heart special moments in her son Jesus' life. I remembered when I first read those words in Mary Lea's Bible class years ago, (and she was sitting next to me today!) and it SO humanized Mary to me, not as the mother of the Christ, but as a mother like me. I have treasured so many moments of my children's lives in my heart! I take them out and look at them, hold them, and put them safely back into my heart for the next time I need them. But Patty also talked about sinking into the pit of depression and despair, letting her faith weaken because she thought if God truly loved her, he would make all the suffering in her life instantly disappear, and in the process she let her family down as well as missing the moments from the lives of her precious children that she should have stored as treasures in her heart ...I felt like she was telling MY story. And I have to admit, up to that point, even though I know better to think this way, I was sitting there comparing myself to this all knowing, all wise, super-mommy, and falling so short...until she got to the down and dirty...and I remembered that none of us are perfect, that we only learn through experience, and that even though we all have different experiences, we still share the HUMAN experience. We all fall short of the glory of God. I've been in that pit, I've missed many treasured moments, and I have a hard time forgiving myself for it. Thank you Patti, for being real with us. I know it's hard to stand up in front of so many people and share our weaknesses. But it is so comforting to be in the presence of other women who have walked through, and yet survived the same trials and hardships. It demonstrates that with God, all things are possible.

Patti closed that portion of her talk by saying that it is crucial to the well being of our children and grandchildren for us to take the time to treasure all of those special moments in our hearts, and to treasure them enough for those children and grandchildren to see that they themselves are special to you...no matter what. Thank you Patti.

Patti shared a little of how she and Steve, as different as they are, shared a love for God which grew them into the "one" they are now. She shared how she made a "bargain"with God that she would dedicate her life to special education, but that then God should give her no children with special needs...God had other plans. Each of Patti's four children have special needs. She shared a just little about the hardships each of her children have endured.

This led into the second thing that Patti shared that was impactful to me. Patti believes that the sustaining force in the lives of her children is that each knows their identity lies in Christ. She taught them from a young age the "ABC's of the names of Jesus." She hung them on the refrigerator, and wrote them on the hearts of her children. And she gave them each 2 or 3 of those names to claim for their own so that they would recognize those characteristics of Jesus in themselves. THAT IS SOOOO AWESOME!!! Of course all I could think was, "why couldn't I have known or done that?" I was back in the comparison mode again! But my Christian "birth mother" Mary Lea was sitting right next to me and must have read it all over my face! She knew I needed a hug, and some reassurance. After I dusted myself off, I came up with my own ways of giving my children the gift of the names of Jesus. Thank you again Patti!

And one final note....Patti handed out a sheet listing some of the treasures her children have stored up in their hearts. And next to each name was Patti's song for that child. The song she listed next to her oldest son's name..."You are my sunshine"...it's the SAME song I always rocked my son to sleep to when he was small, and he made me continue sing to and rock him to at bedtime until he was at least six years old! And the song next to her oldest daughter's name..."You are my special angel"...yup, same song I sang and rocked my daughter to for years as well. If I had written what Patti had written, those would have been the EXACT two songs I would have put down. Wow! It was a goose-bump moment, as well as a glimpse of some of my own heart's treasures.

Thank you Patti! You truly blessed me today, and I am quite sure you blessed each woman in the room, and in turn, all of our families.

This wasn't the post I sat down to write...so humor me!

I've been trying to get to this post for a couple of days now, but the time goes so quickly! It's been a busy week, but more notable, it's been an historic week for our country. I'm a pretty conservative person, so it's probably no stretch of the imagination to figure out I didn't vote for our new president-elect. However, I never thought I'd see the day when this country would elect a person of color as our president. And I'm glad I did!

I was born in 1961, when it was still illegal in many place for "colored" people to even drink from the same water fountain as whites. I remember when I was 5, we moved to a very middle class, but very racially and ethnically mixed neighborhood. The "rich people" on the block, with the fancy house and built-in swimming pool, well, they were black! My best friends on the block, Patty and Rose, they had a house with wall to wall, plush, white carpet and really fancy furniture in their living room, and their mom drove a Cadillac...they were black too. The family across the street, they owned their house...also black. The "old people" next door, Mr. and Mrs. Ellis, they were the typical "nice old people who lived next door"...black. Most of the music my mom listened to was by black artists. (Yay Motown!) WE lived in a duplex, and bill collectors called our house. So I really had no idea until about 1st or 2nd grade that there were people who did not like other people just because of the color of their skin. I found out because I noticed my friends' mother had a baseball bat in her Caddie. They told me it was to keep her safe, and when I asked my mother about it, well the pieces fell into place...It was about the same time there were race riots in New Brunswick, NJ, where my father worked at the time. (Those of you who have been on the Rutgers Campus in New Brunswick recently and have seen the fancy downtown area, I remember when that area was made-up of blown-out, boarded up storefronts after the riots.)

As the years went on, my parents bought their first house in a very white, very small town. There were 2 black families in the entire town, and they both lived on my street. Again, I didn't think anything of it, until one day I told one of my new classmates that my old friends from my last school were black. She said "EWWW! You like BLACK people!" I will always remember that moment vividly, because I had never heard anybody say anything like that before. I remember her name, where we were standing, I think I remember what I was wearing. The whole idea that people could make such a blanket statement was as bewildering to me in 4th grade as is still is now.

Now before you go thinking that I must have grown up in some kind of progressive household...that's not the case. Yes, my mother never indicated any sort of racial prejudice, but my father was a different story. He just wasn't around much, he was working a lot, so it was a long time before I got to know his ideas about the whole thing. My sister was the same age as the black girl up the street, and they became friends. They were a very educated family, the father was a chemist or engineer for Johnson and Johnson, and they lived in the proverbial house with the white picket fence. They also happened to be very light skinned. My father always rationalized that they were the way they were (educated and successful) because they must really be "Polynesian" or something like that! The son was my age, and we became good friends. He was EXTREMELY intelligent. I mentioned to my dad that I thought maybe he and I would go to the senior prom together as friends...well that was a big "NO!" That's all I'm going to say about my dad's views...Fortunately I stayed with my own opinions.

Can I honestly say I've never had a racially or ethnically motivated unkind thought in my life...unfortunately no. I believe the evil one finds every opportunity to use that weapon...humans always want to find someone to be superior to. Every society has some sort of "underclass" that is categorized that way simply because of some superficial, blanket stereotype. I just try very hard to battle those thoughts. We live in one of the most diverse towns in the area...some people wonder why we live here if we can afford to live someplace "better." I'm glad to say my kids like living here, they like the diversity. My kids and their friends, (of many racial, ethnic, and cultural backgrounds) are surprisingly candid about racial differences. They make fun of each other, and themselves, in ways that sometimes horrify me! But their motivation is so different than what I'm used to...they're honest, appreciate the differences, accept the differences, and they don't seem to think one difference is superior to other differences. Like Jerry and Lynn Jones say: "Not right, not wrong, just different."

We worked hard to teach our kids not to distinguish people by their race. The only times I mentioned the color of someone's skin was if it was important to what I was saying. It's amazing how often people will tell me a story, and mention that the people they are talking about are black, as if that changes the perspective. And unfortunately, for a lot of people, it does change perception. I have told the same story two different times to the same people, and when skin color is mentioned their entire demeanor changes. Sad. When Steven was in kindergarten, he has a video game that featured one "white" and one "black" character. You could choose which one you wanted to be. Steven called them "beige" and "brown" and he usually picked the brown boy because Steven had a flat top crew cut at the time, and so did the brown boy in the video game. Sadly, it wasn't until my children celebrated Black History Month in school that they learned how often people are distinguished by the color of their skin.

Anyway...this wasn't even what I sat down to write, but I'll trust the Spirit knows it needed to be written and I'll go with it. My point is, when I chose not to vote for Barack Obama (boy, everyone's going to have to update their spell check now!) it had nothing to do with the color of his skin. And I feel good that I can say that with complete honesty. I looked for reasons TO vote for him, because I wanted to be a part of this historic change, but I had to vote based on the issues and where my conscience was leading me.

There are so many people who feel that the world as we know it will cease to exist, (for better or for worse,) because Obama was elected. Some because of the historic change, some because they were so dissatisfied with the current administration, some because they fear the economic down-turn they are sure will come with Democrats in office, some because they feel the lowly masses will rise-up and overthrow white America, and some who really believe Obama is an undercover Muslim terrorist. All those people are entitled to their opinions and beliefs. I truly embrace the "don't argue about religion and politics" way of relating to others..."you can catch more flies with sugar than vinegar" works for me. So I don't go there. All I know is that I got goose-bumps when I heard an African-American woman on TV cry because she can honestly tell her son that he can grow up to be president of the United States, or anything else he wanted to be, with total honesty and confidence that it can happen.

In our church family, Pitman church of Christ, we have a little slice of heaven. We are diverse, we welcome and respect diversity. But we are truly one in the body of Christ. I've never experienced anything like it, and I doubt I will any place else on this side of heaven. It is a blessing from God that I am grateful for everyday. I believe this kind of unity can only come through Christ. Ultimately, our freedom, our equality, and our unity come from God through Jesus Christ.

As I said...I had no intention of writing this post this way...what I planned to write can wait until the next post because this is SO long already. So in all these thoughts, this is where I derive my JOY today....

"For God does not show favoritism." Romans 2:11

"You are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourself with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." Galatians 3:26-28

"We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother,he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command;
Whoever loves God must also love his brother." 1 John 4:21

Jesus returned to Galilee in the power of the Spirit, and news about him spread through the whole countryside. He taught in their synagogues, and everyone praised him. He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom. And he stood up to read. The scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written:

"The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to release the oppressed,
to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor."

Then he rolled up the scroll, gave it back to the attendant and sat down. The eyes of everyone in the synagogue were fastened on him, and he began by saying to them, "Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing." Luke 4:14-21

Be like children......

Isn't life complicated??? Sometimes my brain is so full of STUFF that I think my head is going to pop off my neck. Sometimes it feels like there's so much going on around me that my eyes are just spinning in their sockets. Remember when we were kids and we would tell our parents how much we couldn't wait to grow up...and they would tell us to just enjoy childhood, that being a grown-up wasn't as fun as it looked to kids??? Being a kid wasn't always what it's cracked up to be either, some of us had childhoods we have no desire to go back and relive. BUT I'm sure we all crave the simplicity that goes along with childhood.

Another thing about childhood back in the day, or the teen years for that matter, is that everything then seemed so black and white, and that life should be fair. Unfortunately for our kids that's not necessarily the the way it is anymore. Truth is not absolute... and fairness, HA! Now it's all about competition and winning no matter what. But our black and white, sometimes fair, world was based on basic truths we learned early on about how to conduct ourselves in life, and those truths were usually reinforced when we went to school, or to our friend's house. I can't help but wonder what the world would be like today if we, as adults, held on to the basics we learned as kids. Would the world be in the mess it's in, would the economy be in a shambles???

A dozen or so years ago, there was a very popular book by Robert Fulghum, "All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten." In the book Fulghum celebrates the simplicity and innocence that comes from childhood and how to see it in your adult life. He discusses some of the basic truths we learn as children. Fulghum was in ministry at one time, but the book gets a little new age now and again. However, the basic concept is biblical: God tells us to be like children too. He says we must be like children to in order to enter the His Kingdom.

My favorite part of the book is a list of things we learned in kindergarten, hence the name of the book. I took his list and found scripture God has given us to teach us those same things. The bold text is Fulghum's, the italics are God's, non- bold, non italics are mine.

“All I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate-school mountain, but there in the sandpile at Sunday School. These are the things I learned:

Share everything.

“ All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.” Acts 2:44-45 *

Play fair.

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” Luke 6:31

Don’t hit people.

“But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.” Matt 5:39

“When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, ’If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone…” John 8:7

Put things back where you found them.

“The wicked borrow and do not repay, but the righteous give generously…”

Psalm 37:21

Clean up your own mess.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” Matt 7:4-5

Don’t take things that aren’t yours.

“You shall not steal.

You shall not covet your neighbors house…” Exodus 20:15, 17

Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody.

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” Luke 6:37

Wash your hands before you eat.

“The LORD has dealt with me according to my righteousness; according to the cleanness of my hands he has rewarded me.” Psalm 18:20

Flush.

Okay. This one just proves that the Bible has guidance for every situation!

“Designate a place outside the camp where you can go to relieve yourself. As part of your equipment have something to dig with, and when you relieve yourself, dig a hole and cover up your excrement.” Deut 23:12-13

Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.

This one is a stretch- but humor me!

“He looked around, there by his head was a cake of bread baked over hot coals…He ate and drank…Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights…” 1 Kings 19:6,8

“Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good.” 1 Peter 2:2-3

Live a balanced life- learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things.” Phil 4:8

“He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.” Eph 4:28

Take a nap every afternoon.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matt 11:28-29

When you go into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.

“Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.” 1 Peter 5:8-9

Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.

“ Then God said ‘Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.’ And it was so.” Genesis 1:11

Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup- they all die. So do we.

“By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return.”

Genesis 3:19

“Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.”

Matt 24:35

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

And remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned- the biggest word of all- LOOK.

“Therefore I will look unto the LORD; I will wait for the God of my salvation: My God will hear me.” Micah 7:7 KJV

Everything you need to know is in there somewhere. The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation. Ecology and politics and equality and sane living.

Take any one of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life or your work or your government or your world and it holds true and clear and firm. Think what a better world it would be if we all- the whole world- had cookies and milk at about three o’clock every afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had a basic policy to always put things back where they found them and to clean up their own mess.

And it’s still true, no matter how old you are- when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.”1

*All scriptures from the NIV of the Bible except where noted.

1. Robert Fulghum, All I Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten (New York: Villard Books, 1990) pages 6, 7, & 8.

I hope you enjoyed my take on Fulghum's list. There is a lot of opportunity for joy in that list! Not just because doing those things can make us happy. But because in doing many of those things we experience the joy that is the fruit of the Spirit that lives in us when we have been born of the water and the Spirit, and once again become like children!

“I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” Matt 18:3

Who ARE those people???

Today, November 3^rd, is the 23^rd anniversary of the day I became Mrs. David Perine! So that explains who those people are in the photos! About 7 years ago, we had a Super Bowl party here for the church youth group, and one of the girls said to me, “Miss Annette, I didn’t know you were married before you married Mr. Dave!” I had no idea what this girl was talking about!!! I told her no, I had never married anyone other than Dave, but she didn’t believe me because she said there was a picture hanging on the wall in the den of me and someone else getting married. No matter how many photos I showed her, she wouldn’t believe that the man in the picture was “Mr. Dave.” Now of course I was completely flattered that she had no doubt that it was me in the picture…but for the life of me I couldn’t understand why she didn’t recognize Dave. He looked exactly the same to me, except for the hair color and the mustache! I still don’t see the difference, to me he’s still the same adorable guy with the great smile.

But the fact of the matter is, we aren’t the same people as the ones in these pictures…thank God for that! Literally! Those two people were alright, they had a lot going for them, they were cute, and spontaneous, and fun…all the things our kids think we’re not anymore! We had all the makings of what we are today. But first of all, there are TWO standing there...Dave and Annette. And now there is ONE…Dave, Annette, and Christ.

I often say the secret to the success of our marriage is an agreement we made during the first few months of our marriage…Dave would never have to iron clothes, and I would never have to mow the lawn, but we would share everything else! And so far, 23 years later, we’ve stuck to it. To this day, Dave would clean the bathroom if I asked him, he helps with the laundry and dishes. I’ll take out the trash, do home improvement projects and fix broken appliances. Our marriage was always good, but it really took off after we became Christians. In many ways we are still who we each married, but in a transformed way. We have a depth of commitment that can only come from doing marriage God’s way. Is it perfect? No, of course not. But the mutual respect that comes from parenting God’s way, doing ministry together God’s way, and putting God first is something I would have never even imagined possible 23 years ago. That’s the real secret to success.

When Dave and I were dating, we found we liked a lot of the same music, some that not many of our friends were into. One of the bands we both really liked was “Chicago” which was unusual because at that point they were way past their heyday. We adopted a couple of their songs as “our songs” that first summer we dated, “Beginnings” and “Just You and Me.” When we were planning our wedding, we were at a loss as to what song to play for our “first dance” because neither of those songs really worked, and we couldn’t come up with anything else we liked. Then one day we were in the car and a song came on the radio that we had never heard before. We recognized that the band playing the song was Chicago, and midway through the song, we knew we had found OUR song! It was "You're the Inspiration." A brand new Chicago song just in time for our wedding! I felt that way about Dave then, and I still do now!

So today my joy comes from the 23 years I have been married to the man I know God created just for me!

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:

If one falls down, his friend can help him up.

But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.

But how can one keep warm alone?

Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

-Ecclesiastes 4:9-12